Yes that is correct, you too can enjoy the benefits of driving Seriously Injured Workers to their own suicides with absolutely NO POSSIBILITY of being prosecuted anywhere in Canada. You heard me right kids, you get to maliciously KILL Seriously Injured Workers to satisfy your naturally inbred Schadenfreude urges. You get to SHARE the profits of this targeted genocide with the entire WCB organization who all share in the profits of your mean spirited passion. Here is your Employee Special Security Clearance code:
Dode 583: Guy Kerr Corporate Air Dick Sucker Team
Yes folks simply copy and paste the special code above into line 51 of your online application and you are on fast tracked into a Schadenfreude WCB AB career, enjoying holidays in the tropics. You will be joined by a special TEAM of corporate dick suckers who you will be able to build a drunken BOND with. Yes folks, this means you too as a WCB Claims Manager can join the drunken "Bitches Club", and share in good times getting corked out of your mind at local pubs and Sucking up to your mentors coaching your Corporate duties. Time and spaces are limited, so please remember to apply now and apply often, this is your Freedom 55 ticket to good times f*cking over Seriously Injured Workers and their families.
Here again is the link to rounding out your Schadenfreude Medical career. There is no other employer in Canada where you will be able to satisfy your need to torture innocent human beings.
http://www.callcentrejob.ca/job-section/alberta/edmonton/case-managers-i663192-c673364/
Yes, that is correct you will be fully empowered by the legislative directives of the Progressive Conservative Party of Alberta to totally destroy the lives of seriously injured workers who are legally entitled to benefits under the WCB AB Act. No need to worry about violating the workers rights, because in the province of Alberta; Workers HAVE NO RIGHTS.
In your new found career you can feel free to act with full impunity, there are no government agencies like cops or those annoying Justice workers that will come to the aide of workers you abuse. Schadenfreude management urges that left you feeling unfulfilled in previous corporate dick sucking positions at Walmart will vanish. Your clients will enjoy untold suffering as you and your peers have been out all night getting corked as hell and laughing about the claims workload, that they will NEVER be compelled to actually process.
Your bosses' only commitment is that his bonus cheque must exceed the $200,000 mark.
You will receive automatic membership in the WCB Alberta Claims Managers "Bitches Club" which entitles you to Highball specials at their favorite drunken watering holes. Hurry spaces are limited.
Do you have a degree purchased cheap from U oaf C? Did you buy your final thesis online? Yes? Your application will be fast tracked and you can begin climbing the corporate dick sucker ladder el' rapido.
Top performing Claims Managers receive AutoGen electronically signed picture of the Prime Minister. This electronically signed photograph is to remind claims managers of how easy it is to generate bogus medical documents to screw Seriously Injured Workers out of benefits and medical treatments. And don't forget these documents will only ADD to your "banked annual" bonus cheque that ALL WCB Alberta employees share in. You will feel like you are an integral working mechanism of the medical abuse Machine! That is correct, your Team will share in an excellent bonus Scheme skimmed off the Billions of dollars in forced contributions skimmed from 2 million workers who are working day and night to build this province.
You and your team will be fully backed up by not so professional drunken Lawyers who are busy spending workers contributions guzzling tens of thousands of dollars per week in booze directly across the street from your office. As a bonus you will receive 50 Free shares in Liqour World.
Your erratic abusive behavior and booze fueled unpredictable wide mood swings brought on by excessive alcohol and drug abuse cannot be litigated against in the province of Alberta, so you can feel confident in your ability to go out and get shit-faced drunk every night and stay up till dawn getting corked as old hell. And since this is a government job where you will sign the same collective agreement as Alberta Health Services, you will only be required to show up Hung-over for a maximum of 3 days per week. And if 3 days is too stressful under your workload of getting shit-faced drunk every night, you can simply claim STRESS take PAID stress leave.
That's right kids, take as long as you need to go on a Government Paid Holiday in the tropics guzzling booze until you have to be rescued from your own vomit on some equatorial beach at a tropical Mexican resort for seriously addicted drunks. When you return, nobody in your abuse Team will even notice that you have been gone. This will be an appropriate time to go out and buy your fantasy Monster gas-guzzling SUV to show off how good it is to be a government employee to your friends and family, because there is NO finance company in Canada that will turn down a Government Employee for financing! Hell buy a diesel powered mini-bus and PIMP it out.
How can you NOT apply for this job. If staying out all night drinking heavy is your favorite hobby, this job is an opportunity that you simply cannot Miss. Apply now and apply often. You don't want to miss out on this opportunity.
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